Conversations with children of senior preschool age on the development of skills of a culture of behavior. Conversation with children of the senior group on the topic “Culture of behavior Conversation about the culture of communication

Lysenko Irina Yurievna

MBOU secondary school №18 Stavropol

Social teacher

Conversation with students in grades 9-11:

"Culture of communication"

Opening speech:

“The word is a commander leading into battle. This is a musician touching the dormant strings of the human soul; know which string to touch, and it will resound with wondrous music. In minutes of such conversations about the sacred and high, I touch the strings that are called: Citizenship, Humanity, Honor, Dignity. I appeal directly to the living soul of every person ... ”(VL. Sukhomlinsky).

What is our speech? (student answers)

Speech is not just a series of sounds that we mechanically pronounce. Language - This is a system of conventional signs with the help of which combinations of sounds are transmitted that have a certain meaning and meaning for people. Speech is the person himself. This is the result of our thinking. This is the character of a person, which defines him as a person. It is the indispensable means by which people interact, cooperate and find mutual understanding. Communication - the exchange of information, and language is a system of signs. Communication between people is carried out not only through language, but also with the help of many other signs: scientific symbols (in mathematics, physics, etc.), signs of art (notes in music, symbols visual arts), maritime signaling, traffic signs. For you, students, it is also a reproduction in speech communication of the knowledge you have gained. This is very important point their assimilation. Your speech is a reflection of the level of your intellectual and cultural development. If a person knows how to use the word correctly, then this has a huge impact on the growth of his authority. The spoken word often has a stronger effect than the written word. A person's speech should be clear and intelligible, figurative, emotional and convincing.

In your opinion, what norms and rules of speech relate to the concept of "cultural speech"? Let's discuss your options and write them on the board. (student answers)

The culture of speech obliges a person to adhere to certain mandatory norms and rules, among which the most important are:

1)pithiness- thoughtfulness and limiting informativeness of expressions; true eloquence consists in saying all that is necessary, but no more;

2)consistency- validity, and consistency of presentation, in which all the leading provisions are interconnected, and are subject to a single thought.

3)evidence- reliability, clarity and validity of the arguments, which should clearly show the interlocutor that everything that is being said exists in reality and is objective;

4)persuasiveness- the ability to convince the interlocutor and ensure that this belief is firmly rooted in his mind; for these purposes, one should take into account the psychological characteristics of the interlocutor, illustrate one's position with vivid examples;

5)clarity- each expression must be clear and precise; too fast speech is difficult to perceive, too slow - causes irritation; dull and inexpressive speech can destroy the deepest thoughts;

6)intelligibility- the use of words and terms that are understandable to the interlocutor; foreign and rarely used words and expressions should not be abused; The use of jargon is not allowed.

7)tact - is an ethical norm that requires the speaker to understand the interlocutor, avoid inappropriate questions, discussing topics that may be unpleasant for him.

8) courtesy is the ability to anticipate possible questions and wishes of the interlocutor, readiness to inform him in detail on all topics essential for the conversation.

9) tolerance is to calmly relate to possible differences of opinion, to avoid sharp criticism of the views of the interlocutor. You should respect the opinions of other people, try to understand why they have this or that point of view. Consistency is closely related to such a quality of character as tolerance - the ability to calmly respond to unexpected or tactless questions and statements of the interlocutor.

10) d benevolence is necessary both in relation to the interlocutor, and in the entire construction of the conversation: in its content and form, in intonation and choice of words.

A high culture of speech is the ability to correctly, accurately and expressively convey one's thoughts by means of language. It also lies in the ability to find the most intelligible and most appropriate means for expressing one's thoughts, suitable for each specific case.

Every day and many times we use expressions speech etiquette: we turn to people, greet them, say goodbye, thank you, apologize, congratulate them on the holiday, wish them success. We sympathize, approve and make a compliment, we advise something, we invite someone, we ask for something - and all this is true, we choose our own roles relative to the roles of the interlocutor, and the specific situation of communication, and national habits and customs.

Let's discuss the main points that we pay attention to when communicating with each other, with teachers, with parents. (student answers)

The main points of our speech, which should be paid attention to.

1. Vocabulary. If you don't read much, you will soon notice that it becomes difficult to find the right word. Words-weeds begin to appear, repetition of what has been said. What is the way out from here? Read more and communicate live, rather than on the Internet.

2. Emphasis. Sometimes there are words that can be pronounced differently. For example: "catalog", "call", "blinds", etc. Without a dictionary, you can’t figure out the correct pronunciation, so if you doubt these words, it’s better to skip them.

3. Extra words. For example: “I, like, well, I kind of meant answer A”, “Type of a working transistor”, “In short, the device works, and all that.” The most frequently repeated words are “shorter”, “type”, “how to put it”, “in general”, “something about”. It's not hard to get rid of it. One or two weeks of training is enough to give your sentences real literary beauty.

4. Tone. Record your speech on a voice recorder. Then listen for yourself and let others listen. Ask your comrades what they don't like about your speech and correct it.

5. Difficult speech. You can say it easier - speak. Everything seems to be clear and correct, but the impression is not at all the same. Follow this. If you speak Russian, then use only Russian words.

6. The ability to listen- an indispensable component of the culture of communication. If you show genuine attention to the thoughts and feelings of the person you are talking to, if you sincerely respect the opinion of your counterpart, you can be sure that you are a good conversationalist and people are pleased to communicate with you. The ability to listen is the key to your success in any life situation and in any society. But what to do if you adhere to the rules of communication culture and follow speech etiquette, and your interlocutor, neglecting the rules of good manners, is trying to pull you "to his side"? If you do not like the manner of communication of your interlocutor or you do not agree with what he is trying to convince you of, express your point of view by starting your speech with the appeal: “Does it seem to you that ...”. If during a conversation you had an argument with your interlocutor, as a result of which you realized that you were wrong, according to the rules of communication culture, you must admit your mistake. Do not bring the situation to conflict.

Since we have already decided on the concepts of the topic under discussion, its principles and fundamental points, I think it is time to discuss the basic rules, effective communication (student answers):

Manifest sincere interest to other people. "A person who shows no interest in his fellow human beings experiences the greatest hardships in life and inflicts the greatest injustices on others."

Try understand the virtues another person and sincerely recognize, praise these virtues. Let people feel their importance and uniqueness.

Instead of judging people try to understand the motives of their actions . This is more effective than criticizing or condemning, since criticism puts a person on the defensive and encourages him to look for excuses for himself, and does not make him think.

Be friendly, welcoming, smile.

Address the person by name , patronymic, remember that for a person the sound of his name is the most important and pleasant sound in human speech.

Talk about what's interesting to your interlocutor.

Be a good listener this encourages a person to talk about himself.

Show respect and tolerance for other people's opinions . Do not use expressions like: “You don’t understand anything!”, “Your views are hopelessly outdated!”, “Thinking like that is stupid!”. Speaking disapprovingly about the opinions, tastes, habits of another person, you offend him, his personality. In addition, most often we measure by ourselves, so remember that you are not a standard for everyone, not a subject for imitation, another person has different views on life, he is even called that - OTHER.

Listen more than talk .

And at the end of our meeting, I offer you several exercises to improve and improve the culture of your speech. They will help you learn how to correctly build sentences, develop your imagination. (2-3 exercises to choose from are performed in the audience).

1. Close your eyes. Think of one of the objects in the room, focus on it. Without opening your eyes, list as many features of this object as you can. After 3 minutes, open your eyes and write down everything you remember, still without looking at the object.

2. Choose a poem that you like. use it last line as the first line of your own poem.

3. Where do you go when you want to take a break from family, work, etc.? Write about this place.

4. In 400 words, describe the ideal place where you would like to live. (to count words, use the "Statistics" item in the Word "Tools" menu)

5. Write what you would say to an uninvited guest who came to your house at three in the morning.

6. Write a story that begins with the words: "I once had an opportunity ... but I missed it."

7. Letter to the past. Write a letter to your 10 year old… yourself.

8. Describe your first toy in 200 words.

9. Write about the most difficult decision you have ever made.

10. Write about the easiest decision you have ever made.

11. Write a story about an empty glass.

12. Think back to the most boring day of your life. Describe it, but remember that your story does not have to be so boring.

13. Start a 500-word article like this: "If I could change something, I would change ..."

14. Write an explanation why you are not improving your writing skills daily.

15. Write a story about the blue item.

16. Imagine that you are in a room full of people, but you are the only blind person in it. Write down how you see the room and people in your imagination.

17. Make a list of everything you fear. Pick one fear and write about it.

18. Describe a hot day in 200 words.

19. What do you do in bad weather? Write 250 words about it.

20. Write about what kind of food you would treat your worst enemy.

21. Think of a person who can be called too proud. Describe the behavior of this person.

22. Using 150 words, describe the appearance, occupation, habits of a person named ... say, Evgeny Kalachikov.

23. List 50 things you will never do.

24. Write a monologue from the point of view of a freshly cut flower.

25. Compose a story using keywords: instructor-dog breeder, law, beach, bun.

26. Write a monologue of a clean sock that was mistakenly put in a refrigerator full of food.

27. List 15 reasons to learn a foreign language.

28. Why is the teacher going to change careers? Name at least 10 reasons.

29. List the 7 worst things you can say to a freshly fired person.

30. Write a short, angry speech of 7 paragraphs, beginning each with the common expression "it grows like weeds."

31. Write a short story using the words: preacher, coin, comb, ladder, well.

32. Write a short story that says Elvis Presley clones have taken over the world.

I hope that our meeting helped you to get familiar with cultural speech. Thank you for your attention.

References:

Dunev A.I. ed. Chernyak V.D. Russian language and culture of speech. –M., 2002

Irina Oni. Thank you, please, hello. Lenizdat, company "Man, 1991.

A. Goldnikova. Good manners in drawings and examples. Translation from Polish, Moscow, Young Guard, 1979

Formanovskaya N.I. Speech etiquette and communication culture. – M.: graduate School, 1989

Encyclopedia for children. I know the world, Moscow, 2000

Conversation for younger students "If you are polite"

Goals: expand knowledge about the rules of cultural behavior; deepen understanding of the moral meaning of these rules; to form a positive attitude towards the rules of a culture of behavior and stimulate self-education and self-control of students.

The course of the conversation

I. Organizational moment.

Teacher. Guys, today we will talk with you about the culture of behavior, about good manners, about politeness. You must always remember that you are not alone in the world. You are surrounded by other people, your loved ones, your comrades. You must behave in such a way that it is easy and pleasant for them to live next to you. Especially it is necessary to be attentive to adults. After all, they work to provide you with everything you need, they treat you when you get sick, they teach you to prepare you for an independent life. You need to cultivate the best character traits in yourself with early childhood. Many books and poems by various writers and poets have been written about politeness. Let's hear what they teach.

Reading a poem by S. Marshak:

IF YOU ARE POLITE

If you are polite

And not deaf to conscience

You are the place without protest

Give in to the old woman

If you are polite

In the soul, not for the mind

In the trolleybus you will help

Climb the disabled.

And if you are polite

That, sitting in the classroom,

You won't be with a friend

To crackle like two magpies.

……………………….

And if you are polite

That in a conversation with my aunt,

With both grandma and grandpa

You won't beat them.

And if you are polite

That's what you need, comrade

Always without delay

Go to a squad meeting.

Don't waste it on comrades

Appearing in advance

minutes for the meeting.

Waiting hours!

And if you are polite

then you are in the library

Nekrasov and Gogol

Take not forever.

And if you are polite

Will you return the book?

In neat, not smeared

And the whole binding.

And if you are polite, -

For those who are weaker

You will be the protector

Do not be shy before the strong.

Teacher. Guys, you all know the proverb: "A guest in the house is a joy in the house." Have you ever wondered why, in fact, people go to visit? There are many reasons for this. Firstly when, seeing you, someone will be delighted and smile warmly. Secondly, different people gather at a party; they will talk about this and that - and everyone will benefit: they learned the news, discussed events, exchanged information - and everyone became a little richer, smarter. And one more thing: people are used to sharing good things with each other. And if grief - you do not need to call. Those who came in days of joy will come to share sorrow. That is why from ancient times to the present day people go to visit. It goes without saying that over such a long time, very clear and definite ideas have developed about how to behave as a host and guest.

Now I will tell you how one boy came to visit another. He was not a very tactful guest. Find and count errors in his behavior, just be careful: there are many errors, at least 10, and maybe more.

Story

Once Igor said to Victor:

You know, come to me today at six o'clock. I'll show you my brands and a new designer. Let's listen to the tape recorder.

Okay, said Victor. - I'll come.

At seven o'clock Igor had already stopped waiting for his comrade. He was about to go about his business, but at that time the bell rang sharply and strongly. While Igor was walking to the door, someone did not let go for a long time, pressing the bell button several times.

Hello, - said Victor, - it's me.

He went into the room, threw his wet raincoat and cap on an armchair and looked around.

And you have nothing. Suitable. What's this?

And he grabbed the model sailboat from the desk.

This was given to my father.

Well done! What about wooden masts? - Victor pressed harder, and the mast crunched weakly.

Igor looked frightened, but said nothing. And the guest at that time was already fiddling with a multi-color ballpoint pen in his hands, alternately pressing bright buttons and trying each color on a half-written sheet of paper that lay on the table. Then Victor went to wander around the rooms.

How much does it cost? And where did you buy it? he asked every minute, touching a crystal vase, a picture on the wall, a merry clay ram with golden horns. He did not like the ram.

What junk do you keep at home? - On Victor's face was clearly expressed contempt for the tastes of the owners. But the dressing table aroused his particular interest. He opened the bottle of perfume, turned it upside down and shook it over his head until it was almost half empty. Then Victor poked a dirty finger into the box of cream, sniffed it and, saying that it smelled like strawberries, licked it. Then he

he breathed into the powder, and a fragrant cloud scattered around the room, slowly settling on the carpet and a small polished table.

Igor at this time boiled tea and invited the guest to the table. He critically examined the glasses of tea, the vase of jam, the sugar bowl, and pulled the handle of the refrigerator towards him.

You cut sausages, Igor. And this is a herring, or what? And give herring. I know how salty I like.

Having eaten and drunk plenty of tea, Victor took up his cap.

Uh-huh, I'm off bye. I'll still come tomorrow. I took your penknife. I need to cut a stick. I'll give it sometime! -

And, rattling his boots, he rushed up the stairs.

Teacher. Guys, what mistakes did you notice? (Children name mistakes.) From this story, you learned how not to behave at a party. You will draw your own conclusions on how to behave at a party. And now let's talk about how to behave in the theater, at a play, at a concert, in a cinema. Now the guys will tell you a few rules, and you tell me whether it is right or not.

"Lessons of courtesy":

1. When giving your things to the cloakroom attendant, in no case should you throw your coat over the barrier. Let him work on his own. If everyone does this, beautiful muscles will develop in the arms.

2. It is best to hang the number on your finger, so it will be convenient to rotate it in the lobby and during the concert. It is for this that a hole is made on the numbers or a rope is tied.

3. If your seats are in the middle of the row, do not rush to take them. Let the others sit down first. But then, when you pass, they will have to get up, it's like exercising, it's good for health.

4. Don't forget: you don't often have to sit next to each other for 1.5-2 hours. Use this opportunity to share all the news and discuss difficult issues. One thing is bad: sometimes you have to strain your vocal cords, as the music and the replicas of the actors interfere.

5. Remember that staying still for a long time is very harmful to the health of the body. Therefore, move more: turn, lean, rest against the back of the front chair and push the neighbors' hands off the armrests.

Teacher. Guys, from these episodes you learned how not to behave in a movie theater, at a performance.

Guys, now I will read you a few rules, and you answer why this is so.

1. Why do we not touch the edges of the cup while stirring tea? (So ​​as not to disturb the people around.)

2. Guests came to the birthday man, they present gifts, among which there are things that are not very necessary for the hero of the occasion. The birthday boy thanks, assuring that he is very happy with the gift. Why? (The guests wanted to please him. We must make sure that the guests were also pleased.)

3. A passer-by dropped an object, you should pick it up and give it to the passer-by. This makes the one who is closest to the subject. Why such a rule? (Because it is not known whether he himself can bend over the object, whether it is easy for him to do this, and whether he will notice the fallen object.)

4. A boy is sitting in public transport. A girl enters. What should the boy do? 1) The boy gives way to her. "Sit down please". - "Thanks". 2) The boy, seeing the girl, gets up and steps aside. What's better? (The second option is more correct. It is necessary to act in such a way that politeness is not burdensome, does not bother a person, is invisible.)

IV. Final part.

Guys, today we talked about politeness, good manners, and a culture of behavior. I think that you have memorized the rules of conduct and understood what a schoolboy should be like.

And at the end of our conversation, I want to say a few words about greetings, about polite word"hello". What a great meaning lies in this word: “I see you”, “Today we see each other for the first time”, “I am glad that I see you”.

A careless, gloomy, indifferent, condescending, hurried "hello" can ruin the whole day.

But "hello" sincere, benevolent, friendly, adorned with a smile, a slight bow of the head, can work wonders. "Hello". What special things did we say to each other? Just "hello", we didn't say anything else. Why did a drop of sun increase in the world? Why is there a drop of happiness in the world? Why did life become a little more joyful? (V. Soloukhin).

Teenagers do not like culture, but they still have their own culture. How to make the culture of teenagers more cultured? What to teach your teenagers, how to communicate with each other? Here are some thoughts on the subject.

Scope: here we are talking about the communication of teenage children within the same family. Two brothers. Brother and sister ... Street communication of teenagers from different families is not considered here.

Teenage children often quarrel over seemingly nonsense: “Why did she tell me that! And why did he push me!”, But for them these little things are really important, and they still don’t know how to respond competently to conflictogens. Meaningful parents can very well (and with great benefit to overall personal development) teach their teens to respond to each other in a more nurtured way - in the way that adults and respectful people do.

Of course, you need to start by living in such a way that your life is a model for children. Secondly, you must have authority for children, your children, in principle, must listen and obey you. If they don’t put you in a penny and live a life separate from you, how will you teach them at least something? Thirdly, adolescence is not easy, and if your children are in a difficult teenage crisis, you need not to improve their culture, but to help them cope with the problems that have piled on them. However, families are not only problematic, but also of high quality, and this article is for them.

Meaningful parents in a quality family teach their teenage children the following things to communicate with each other.

If there is a hierarchy in the family, everything is quite simple:

1. The Elder (brother or sister) is responsible for everything. If the younger is to blame for something, the older is responsible for it. The main concern of the Elder is to take care of the younger ones.

2. The younger ones obey the Elder. All disagreements are resolved by the one whom the parents have appointed senior (in this matter and the issue). If the parents have not appointed anyone, all issues are decided by the eldest in age: as he decides, and correctly. Be sure to obey the elder.

3. First you did it, then you discuss it. But you can be warned. If you disagree with the Elder, you can warn him that you will bring the issue up for discussion with your parents. At the same time, if the Elder repeats his order, you carry it out.

4. If you are the Elder and the Younger does not obey you, you can act within the framework of what your parents allow you to do. If the permitted punishments do not help, you relieve yourself of responsibility and report what happened to your parents.

If in a family relations between children are built on an equal footing, the rules are different:

• We do not react to trifles, we do not respond to rudeness with rudeness.

If they pushed you, they said something offensive to you, they hurt you in one way or another, you can’t answer in response - shout, accuse, shove, and so on in response. They allowed what happened to happen, they remained alive, well, don’t pout and don’t stir up a quarrel, it’s better to apologize yourself (yourself) - most likely, there were reasons on your part. Learn to skip the little things, we do not react to the little things! It's another matter if obvious rudeness sounds in your address, or we are seriously learning the culture of communication, how well-mannered people communicate. Then immediately -

• Pay attention to yourself.

Pay attention to your words to be heard. If they look at you and wait for an answer, pause expressively. If pushing, have already passed you, then call out: "Hey!". It's not really polite, actually, but a polite "Can I have you for a minute?" for adolescents, it is often not at all typical and not habitual.

• Give someone else a mirror.

In a calm and kind way, pay attention to what the other has done to you. "It so happened that you pushed me with your elbow. It was unpleasant for me" or "You asked where I put your headphones ... Tell me, is this a reproach? Is this an accusation?". It is highly likely that he simply did not see it, did not notice. He did his own thing, but he simply did not pay attention to you. If he apologized for this right away - good, and the issue is closed. If not -

• Make a request for the future.

Important - make your request feasible: understandable, specific, and easy to make. "I have a request - to clarify all questions without reproaches and accusations, in a calm way. Is it normal?" "If you need to pass, and I'm standing on the road and it's completely inconvenient for you to pass, you just tell me, I'll naturally move away, or even better, I'll help you. Okay?"

• Finish smartly.

If the request is accepted normally, they rolled out for a benevolent continuation. If objections begin - start negotiations and agree when and where you will discuss it.

If you cannot agree and resolve the issue among yourself, parents (and other authoritative elders) can be connected to the disassembly. This is not a snitch, but a responsible act, since the RULE OF ACCUSATIONS begins to work: "If an accusation of the other side was made in the disassembly, the punishment is inevitable, but who will be punished, the adult will figure it out. If the accusation is fair, the other side will be punished. If it is unfair, the one who who came out with an unjust accusation."

So - think before you complain and blame.

How to teach?

Teach - as a rule, only gradually and methodically. It is better to break it all into parts and demand not everything at once, but point by point or in fragments, so that the matter is feasible and that it works out.

For example, at first to confirm the first point: "We do not react to trifles, we do not respond to rudeness with rudeness." Explain, repeat, hang a reminder ad. If necessary, use the "Stop" rule. When this is learned, it is useful to work out requests, "Make a request for the future." Show, let them repeat, show in other situations, let them repeat again - they will gradually understand and accept. Points "Pay attention to yourself", "Give another a mirror" and "Complete competently" can be gently prompted last, when the essence is already understood and mastered.

Once again: all this concerns, first of all, communication within the family. It seems unrealistic to extend these requirements to communication at school, where communication norms are set not by parents, but by the school. That is, first of all, the children themselves. And within the family - we can do a lot. We suggest, support, praise our loved ones and talented ones - but we stand like a wall in the fact that this is already mandatory, it is no longer possible in another way. Sooner or later, it's time to grow up, it's time to accustom yourself to culture, and now is just the right time!

What do you think, colleagues?

Podgainaya Tatiana
Abstract of the lesson on the formation of communication culture skills in children and adolescents with disabilities "We live among people"

Topic: "We we live among people»

Job title: social teacher

Target. Formation of knowledge, skills and cultural communication skills and norms of behavior in various life situations, development skills interpersonal interactions with adults and peers.

Tasks:

1. form the ability to determine the role of adults in relation to the younger generation.

2. Learn to observe ethical standards of behavior in relation to adults.

3. Cultivate the ability not to interfere in the conversation of adults, form a habit constructing a conversation.

Equipment: layout "Magic tree", yellow, green and red "apples", sheets of paper, felt-tip pens, colored paper, colored cardboard, plasticine, scissors, glue.

Course progress.

Introductory part.

1. Greeting. An exercise "Mood Barometer".

Children are invited to say their name and show their mood (like a barometer tells the weather)only with hands: bad mood - palms touch each other, good - hands are spread apart.

Main part.

2. Conversation "Those incomprehensible adults".

Cultural and a decent person can be quite quickly distinguished by the manners of behavior and communication, especially if these courtesies concern the respectful attitude towards people of the older generation.

AT modern etiquette there are a large number of rules that relate to respect for older people. Let's get to know some of them:

Consider mood and adult employment.

Imagine that your parents came home from work tired and excited. First of all, they need to rest and calm down. You should not disturb them with your problems, at least for a while. Put yourself in their place, and everything will immediately become clear and understandable to you.

Speak kind words more often.

Polite words embellish human speech and make human relationships more friendly. The words "Thanks", "sorry", "please" absolutely necessary. Besides, must be remembered: in communication intonation and tone of voice play an important role.

Listen patiently to comments from adults.

An adult is wiser and smarter than you, because he has a lot of life experience. He knows better than you in difficult life situations. Therefore, you should listen to the comments and advice of adults.

An adult makes a remark to you out of good intentions.

Always speak the truth.

Lies do not make a person beautiful. First, lying is not profitable. It is very likely that the lie will be revealed. But then adults will be angry with you not only for the act itself, but also for what you lied to them!

Don't interrupt the elder.

It is not permissible for a young person not only to interrupt an older person, but also to begin and end a conversation with people of advanced years himself.

We live in a society, that is, in society and we can't do without communication through which people exchange information, life experience and experiences. Without dialogue, discussion, conversation, it is impossible to imagine human existence. For convenience communication man made the rules among which there are relating to relationships between people of different ages. Let's get to know some of them:

1. Which adult can talk "you"?

2. Why, in your opinion, do not argue with the elders, even if he is wrong?

3. Why can't you show irritation and your bad mood to an adult with whom you communicate?

3. Exercise "Being an adult means"

The easel contains the phrase "To be an adult means." In turn, children write down the most important, in their opinion, qualities of an adult.

4. Mobile game "Please"

The game uses a magic word "please". Children are asked to follow certain commands. They only do them when the word is spoken "please".

Raise your hands, please.

Jump on one leg.

Say hello to your neighbor, please.

Clap your hands.

Pull your ear, please.

5. Creative task "Wish to the person dearest to me"

Children are invited to make a card with a wish for the most significant person for them. (mothers, fathers, grandfathers, aunts, teachers).

Final part.

6. Reflection "Magic Tree"

Children name what they liked the most, talk about their mood after the lessons. They are offered "apples" for "Magic tree" which they must choose to evaluate lessons.

Didn't like green

Didn't like it very much - yellow,

Liked the red.

7. Ritual of farewell. An exercise "Good wish".

All children sit in a circle. The first participant gets up, approaches the other, says goodbye to him, and tells him a wish for today. The one approached by the first participant will in turn approach the next, and so on, until everyone has received a wish for the day.

Related publications:

Lesson summary Spring has come 1. Game: "Sun, Rain, Wind." Psychologist for children: for three different signals (showing pictures: wind, clouds, sun).

Formation of skills of communicative and moral culture of behavior in children with disabilities for the purpose of social adaptation in society A person has to be in different situations, meet different people. To always and everywhere look decent and feel good.

Abstract of the lesson "Beauty Butterflies" for children and adolescents with disabilities Purpose: - to consolidate the ability of children and adolescents with disabilities to work in non-traditional "monotype" technique; - educate love for nature and care.

Abstract of the lesson on cognitive development and socialization “Man among people. Friendship" for the senior group Synopsis of a lesson on cognitive development socialization Senior group Topic: Man among people. Friendship Lexical topic: "vegetables"

Abstract of a lesson on the development of speech and the formation of a culture of speech communication for children of the middle group "Garden Flowers" PURPOSE: - to develop interest in the development and growth of plants in a flower bed, observation and curiosity, visual-effective thinking. Introduce.

The culture of speech is one of the main indicators of the general culture of a person. Therefore, we all need to constantly improve our manners of communication and speech. The culture of speech lies not only in the ability to avoid mistakes in speech, but also in the desire to constantly enrich one's vocabulary, in the ability to listen and understand the interlocutor, respect his point of view, in the ability to choose the right words in each specific communication situation.

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A culture of speech

The culture of speech is one of the main indicators of the general culture of a person. Therefore, we all need to constantly improve our manners of communication and speech. The culture of speech lies not only in the ability to avoid mistakes in speech, but also in the desire to constantly enrich one's vocabulary, in the ability to listen and understand the interlocutor, respect his point of view, in the ability to choose the right words in each specific communication situation.

Communication culture

Speech is one of the most important characteristics of a person. The way we communicate affects the impression we make on others. A person's speech can attract people to him or, conversely, repel them. Speech can also have a strong influence on the mood of our interlocutor.

Thus, the culture of communication consists of the ability to listen to the interlocutor, speech etiquette, as well as compliance with the rules of good manners.

The ability to listen

Often, being carried away by the topic of conversation, we completely forget about the culture of communication: we try to impose our point of view on the topic of conversation on the interlocutor; we do not try to delve into the arguments that our counterpart cites, we simply do not listen to him; and, finally, in an effort to make everyone around us agree with our view of things, we neglect speech etiquette: we stop following our own words.

According to the rules of the culture of communication, it is strictly forbidden to put pressure on the interlocutor. In addition to the fact that imposing one's opinion is very ugly, it is also inefficient. Your demeanor is likely to cause defensive reaction partner, and then your conversation, at best, simply does not work out.

If you not only do not listen to your counterpart, but also constantly interrupt him, not allowing him to finish, you should know that you not only demonstrate your lack of speech culture, but also show disrespect for the personality of the interlocutor, which characterizes you by no means on the positive side .

The ability to listen is an indispensable component of the culture of communication. If you show genuine attention to the thoughts and feelings of the person you are talking to, if you sincerely respect the opinion of your counterpart, you can be sure that you are a good conversationalist and people enjoy talking to you. The ability to listen is the key to your success in any life situation and in any society.

But what to do if you adhere to the rules of communication culture and follow speech etiquette, and your interlocutor, neglecting the rules of good manners, is trying to pull you "to his side"? If you do not like the manner of communication of your counterpart or you do not agree with what he is trying to convince you of, express your point of view by starting your speech with an etiquette cliché: "Does it seem to you that ...".

If during a conversation you had an argument with your interlocutor, as a result of which you realized that you were wrong, according to the rules of communication culture, you must admit your mistake. Do not bring the situation to conflict.

speech culture

According to most people, speech is just a mechanism for putting your thoughts into words. But this is an erroneous assumption. Speech and speech etiquette are important tools in establishing communication with people, in establishing contacts (in particular, in business area), in increasing the productivity of communication, in inclining the mass audience to their side (in public speaking, for example).

Among other things, the culture of speech has a huge impact on the behavior of the speaker himself. After all, everyone knows that the manner of speech and the choice of words in a dialogue not only set the interlocutor in the right mood, but also program our own behavior. We monitor our speech etiquette, weigh every word spoken and heard in response.

In the business sphere, situations often arise when, according to our speech culture, others judge not only ourselves, but also the institution, the official representative of which we are. Therefore, it is extremely important to observe speech etiquette during business meetings and meetings. If you have a bad culture of speech, it sharply lowers your career opportunities. You will have to familiarize yourself with the rules of speech etiquette in order to first get a job in a prestigious organization, and then not spoil the company's image and have a chance for promotion.

Another situation in which the culture of speech plays a decisive role is public speaking.

Public speaking

If you want to be successful in front of a mass audience of listeners, prepare a plan and the main theses of your public speech in advance.

When speaking, try to avoid an instructive tone.

Try to put some lively emotions into your oratory. The correct intonation will help you convey your own indifference to the problem. Speak from the heart, but at the same time simply and competently - and then you will make a positive impression on the audience, captivate them with the topic of your public speech.

In order to interest the audience and attract the attention of all listeners, to convince them that you are right, you need to use comparative statistics as an argument in defense of your position.

Try to exclude the cliches that bother everyone from the text of your public speech. By using words that have already been said hundreds of times, you thereby "lull" the attention of the entire audience.

At the end of a public speech, it can be effective to return to the beginning of the oratorical speech, to re-focus on the problem.

Speech etiquette. Rules of speech culture:

Avoid verbosity in any communication situation. If you want to convey some idea to the listener, you do not need extra words that distract attention from the main subject of speech.

Before entering into a conversation, clearly formulate for yourself the purpose of the upcoming communication.

Try to always speak briefly, clearly and precisely.

Strive for verbal diversity. For each specific communication situation, you must find suitable words that are different from those that are applicable in other situations. The more complexes of various words for individual situations you have, the higher your speech culture will become. If a person does not know how to choose words that meet the requirements of a particular situation of communication, then he does not know the culture of speech.

Learn to find a common language with any interlocutor. Regardless of the manner of communication of the counterpart, follow the principles of the culture of speech, be polite and friendly.

Never answer rudeness with rudeness. Do not stoop to the level of your poorly educated interlocutor. Following the principle of "an eye for an eye" in such a situation, you will only demonstrate the absence of your own culture of speech.

Learn to be attentive to the interlocutor, listen to his opinion and follow the course of his thoughts. Try to always show the right response to the words of your counterpart. Be sure to answer the interlocutor if you see that he needs your advice or attention. Remember, when you do not respond to the words of the interlocutor, you are grossly violating speech etiquette.

Make sure that during a conversation or public speaking, emotions do not overpower your mind. Maintain self-control and self-control.

Violation of the rules of speech etiquette is possible in cases where it is necessary to achieve expressiveness of speech. However, in no case should you stoop to the use of obscene words. Otherwise, there can be no talk of any culture.

When communicating with the interlocutor, do not adopt his communication style: stick to your positive speech habits. Of course, it is necessary to look for a common language with any interlocutor, but imitating his manner of communication, you lose your individuality.

Speech etiquette

I'm sorry!

To Unfortunately, we often hear this form of address.Speech etiquette and communication culture- not very popular concepts in modern world. One will consider them too decorative or old-fashioned, the other will find it completely difficult to answer the question of what forms of speech etiquette are found in his daily life.

Meanwhile, the etiquette of speech communication plays an important role for the successful activity of a person in society, his personal and professional growth, building strong family and friendships.

The concept of speech etiquette

Speech etiquette is a system of requirements (rules, norms) that explain to us how to establish, maintain and break contact with another person in a certain situation.Norms of speech etiquettevery diverse, each country has its own characteristics of the culture of communication.

speech etiquette - a system of rules

It may seem strange why you need to develop special rules of communication, and then stick to them or break them. And yet, speech etiquette is closely related to the practice of communication, its elements are present in every conversation. Compliance with the rules of speech etiquette will help you correctly convey your thoughts to the interlocutor, quickly reach mutual understanding with him.

Mastering the etiquette of speech communication requires gaining knowledge in the field of various humanitarian disciplines: linguistics, psychology, cultural history and many others. For a more successful mastering of the skills of a culture of communication, such a concept is used asspeech etiquette formulas.

Speech etiquette formulas

The basic formulas of speech etiquette are learned in early age when parents teach a child to say hello, say thank you, ask for forgiveness for tricks. With age, a person learns more and more subtleties in communication, masters various styles of speech and behavior. The ability to correctly assess the situation, start and maintain a conversation with a stranger, competently express their thoughts, distinguishes a person of high culture, educated and intelligent.

Speech etiquette formulas- these are certain words, phrases and set expressions used for the three stages of conversation:

start a conversation (greeting/introduction)

main part

final part of the conversation

Starting a conversation and ending it

Any conversation, as a rule, begins with a greeting, it can be verbal and non-verbal. The order of greeting also matters. junior first greets the elder, a man - a woman, a young girl - an adult man, a junior in position - a senior. We list in the table the main forms of greeting the interlocutor:

At the end of the conversation, they use formulas for ending communication, parting. These formulas are expressed in the form of wishes (all the best, all the best, goodbye), hopes for further meetings (see you tomorrow, I hope to see you soon, we'll call you), or doubts about further meetings (goodbye, do not remember dashingly).

The main part of the conversation

After the greeting, the conversation begins. Speech etiquette provides for three main types of situations in which various speech formulas of communication are used: solemn, mournful and work situations. The first phrases uttered after the greeting are called the beginning of the conversation. It is not uncommon for situations where the main part of the conversation consists only of the beginning and the end of the conversation following it.

speech etiquette formulas - set expressions

Solemn atmosphere, approach important event suggest the use of speech turns in the form of an invitation or congratulations. At the same time, the situation can be both official and informal, and it depends on the situation which formulas of speech etiquette will be used in the conversation.

The mournful atmosphere in connection with the events that bring grief suggests condolences expressed emotionally, not on duty or dryly. In addition to condolences, the interlocutor often needs consolation or sympathy. Sympathy and consolation can take the form of empathy, confidence in a successful outcome, accompanied by advice.

In everyday life, the work environment also requires the use of speech etiquette formulas. Brilliant or, conversely, improper performance of assigned tasks can be a reason for issuing gratitude or censure. When following orders, an employee may need advice, for which it will be necessary to ask a colleague. It also becomes necessary to approve someone else's proposal, give permission for execution or a reasoned refusal.

The request should be extremely polite in form (but without fawning) and understandable to the addressee, the request should be delicate. When requesting the desirable, avoid the negative form, use the affirmative. Advice must be given non-categorically; addressing advice will be an incentive to action if it is given in a neutral, delicate form.

For the fulfillment of a request, the provision of a service, useful advice, it is customary to express gratitude to the interlocutor. Also an important element in speech etiquette is compliment . It can be used at the beginning, middle and end of a conversation. Tactful and timely said, he lifts the mood of the interlocutor, disposes to a more open conversation. A compliment is useful and pleasant, but only if it is a sincere compliment, said with a natural emotional coloring.

Situations of speech etiquette

The key role in the culture of speech etiquette is played by the concept situation . Indeed, depending on the situation, our conversation can change significantly. In this case, communication situations can be characterized by a variety of circumstances, for example:

personalities of interlocutors

place

topic

time

motive

goal

The personalities of the interlocutors.Speech etiquette is focused primarily on the addressee - the person being addressed, but the personality of the speaker is also taken into account. Accounting for the personality of the interlocutors is implemented on the principle of two forms of address - to You and to You. The first form indicates the informal nature of communication, the second - respect and great formality in conversation.

Place of communication. Communication in a certain place may require the participant to have specific rules of speech etiquette established for this place. Such places can be: a business meeting, a social dinner, a theater, a youth party, a restroom, etc.

In the same way, depending on the topic of conversation, time, motive or purpose of communication, we use different conversational techniques. The topic of conversation can be joyful or sad events, the time of communication can be conducive to being brief or to a detailed conversation. Motives and goals are manifested in the need to show a sign of respect, express a benevolent attitude or gratitude to the interlocutor, make an offer, ask for a request or advice.

National speech etiquette

Any national speech etiquette imposes certain requirements on the representatives of their culture, and has its own characteristics. The very appearance of the concept of speech etiquette is associated with the ancient period in the history of languages, when each word was given special meaning, and there was a strong belief in the effect of the word on surrounding reality. And the emergence of certain norms of speech etiquette is due to the desire of people to bring certain events to life.

But the speech etiquette of different nations is also characterized by some common features, with a difference only in the forms of implementation of the speech norms of etiquette. In each cultural and linguistic group there are formulas of greeting and farewell, respectful appeal to elders by age or position. In a closed society, a representative of a foreign culture, not familiar with the peculiarities of national speech etiquette, appears to be an uneducated, poorly educated person. In a more open society, people are prepared for differences in the speech etiquette of different peoples; in such a society, imitation of a foreign culture of speech communication is often practiced.

Speech etiquette of our time

In the modern world, and even more so in the urban culture of the post-industrial and information society, the concept of a culture of speech communication is changing radically. The speed of changes taking place in modern times threatens the very traditional foundations of speech etiquette, based on ideas about the inviolability of the social hierarchy, religious and mythological beliefs.

The study of the norms of speech etiquette in the modern world is turning into a practical goal focused on achieving success in a particular act of communication: if necessary, attract attention, show respect, inspire confidence in the addressee, his sympathy, create a favorable climate for communication. However, the role of national speech etiquette remains important - knowledge of the characteristics of a foreign speech culture is a mandatory sign of fluency in a foreign language.

Russian speech etiquette in circulation

The main feature of Russian speech etiquette can be called its heterogeneous development throughout the existence of Russian statehood. Serious changes in the norms of Russian language etiquette took place at the turn of the 19th and 20th centuries. The former monarchical system was distinguished by the division of society into estates from nobles to peasants, which determined the specifics of treatment in relation to the privileged estates - master, sir, master. At the same time, there was no single appeal to representatives of the lower classes.

As a result of the revolution, the former estates were abolished. All appeals of the old system were replaced by two - a citizen and a comrade. The appeal of a citizen has acquired a negative connotation, it has become the norm in the use of prisoners, convicted persons, detainees in relation to representatives of law enforcement agencies. The address comrade, on the contrary, was fixed in the meaning of "friend."

In the days of communism, only two types of address (and in fact, only one - comrade), formed a kind of cultural and speech vacuum, which was informally filled with such addresses as man, woman, uncle, aunt, boy, girl, etc. They remained and after the collapse of the USSR, but in modern society are perceived as familiarity, and indicate a low level of culture of the one who uses them.

In post-communist society, the old types of address gradually began to reappear: gentlemen, madam, mister, etc. As for the address comrade, it is legally fixed as an official address in power structures, the armed forces, communist organizations, in collectives of factories and factories.

Communication culture

Communication is a communicative process, a kind of connecting thread that unites people with each other. Culture is a very multifaceted and capacious concept, but when we say the culture of communication, everyone knows what is meant by this term. The culture of communication is a certain set of rules that every self-respecting person adheres to. Compliance with these rules is an indicator of the level of education and culture of a person as a whole, without a culture of communication it is impossible to interact with people in a civilized society, it is impossible to conduct business and establish business contacts.

The main element of communication is speech, it is on how cultural your speech is, structured and intellectual, that the whole culture of communication with you depends. With the help of words, we express our thoughts and our attitude towards the interlocutor, show respect, recognition, love, or vice versa make it clear that the interlocutor is unpleasant to us, we do not consider him a worthy opponent, we do not respect him and his opinion.

The framework of culture in communication is set by the interlocutors themselves, sometimes people who have just met, easily switch to “you”, communicate warmly and friendly, as if they have known each other for many years. While people have known each other for a long time, they may not go beyond certain limits and remain in communication over a long distance.

Cultural communication is always pleasant to interlocutors and does not cause discomfort. General impression about the interlocutor is made up not only of his speech and expressions, the visual image is also important. Clothes and shoes should be clean and tidy, appearance should correspond to the level of a cultured person, it is unacceptable: untidy hairstyle, unwashed hair, dirt under the nails - these factors repel the interlocutor and leave a negative impression about you.

If the interlocutor does not restrain himself during communication, and expresses his emotions too sharply, and here you should not lose the appearance of a cultural interlocutor, with your speech turns you can cool your opponent and rebuild him in a positive way. When expressing one's own opinion, it is necessary to say “I believe ...”, “According to my opinion ...”, etc.

The culture of communication implies the observance of certain rules not only in verbal speech, but also in non-verbal - facial expressions, gestures, body posture.

Non-verbal culture of communication implies an open position of the body, minimal gestures, it is very uncivilized to wave your arms in front of the interlocutor's face. It is not customary to stand sideways to the interlocutor or turn your back. Facial expressions are quite difficult to control during a conversation, but you need to make sure that your face does not become an unpleasant grimace when expressing any emotions.

The “closed” posture is also negatively perceived by the interlocutor: crossed arms on the chest and crossed legs. To take such a pose in relation to the interlocutor is a sign of uncivilized.

If communication takes place while sitting, it is uncivilized to sway in a chair, turn away from the interlocutor, fidget in the seat, brush your nails, gnaw toothpicks and not look at the interlocutor. It is also not nice to stare at the interlocutor and look at him without taking your eyes off.

Cultural communication is always a dialogue, exchange of opinions, expression of one's own thoughts and interest in the thoughts of the interlocutor. No need to pull the initiative of the conversation on yourself, and even more so for a long and tedious talk about what worries only you. Do not be afraid if during the conversation there is a pause and silence hangs, this means that the interlocutors are gathering their thoughts, there is no need to chatter incessantly to “score” all the pauses. It is extremely uncivilized to interrupt the interlocutor in the middle of a phrase, if you really need to say something, you always need to apologize for interrupting the interlocutor's speech.

The culture of communication implies that two smart and cultured people participate in communication, who perfectly understand the limits of what is permitted and do not allow themselves to violate them. It is uncivilized to convey rumors, gossip in a conversation, and if you decide to gossip and “wash the bones” to some mutual friend, then such a conversation cannot be called cultural at all.

The culture of communication is an integral part of behavior in society, any conversation, conversation, phrase directed in someone's direction must be cultured, beautiful and worthy.

Marina Kurochkina

Culture of communication and features of interpersonal relations

The culture of communication is part of the culture of behavior, which is expressed mainly in speech, in the mutual exchange of remarks and conversation. The assimilation of communication norms is the result of education in the broadest sense of the word. Of course, a person must be taught to communicate, to give him knowledge of the various meanings in which various meanings of relationships are expressed, to teach him adequate reactions to the actions and actions of others, to help him learn the model of behavior accepted in this social environment.
All etiquette, all rules of communication must be permeated with a deep humanistic content.
Politeness is perceived as a real talent for communication. The culture of communication, in addition to such character traits as respect for people, benevolence and tolerance, involves the development of politeness and tact. Politeness is a character trait, the main content of which is the observance of certain rules of behavior in various situations of human communication. Tact implies not only the knowledge of respect for decency, but also a sense of proportion in relations between people.
An essential aspect of cultural communication is the ability to impartially enter into communication with other people, without imposing one's tastes and habits. Of great importance in the culture of communication is the presence of such a quality as delicacy, which is deeper than good breeding.
The culture of people's communication is closely related to the extent to which they have individual specific skills and communication skills. This is the ability of a person to change his first impressions of a partner when meeting him. The first impression is formed on the basis of the partner's appearance. Accordingly, appearance - physical appearance, demeanor, clothing and specific turns of speech - significantly affects the nature of our first relationship to him.
Not everyone has the gift of being able to carry on a conversation, but no one should be indifferent to how the word should be handled.
Currently, people often do not attach due importance to the communicative side of communication.
The spoken word has always been the main means of communication and influencing people. It is through speech that colleagues at work recognize us, judge the level of our professional competence, intellect and culture. Undoubtedly, the culture of business conversation is an indicator of the cultural level of the individual, his ability to communicate. At the same time, speech defects can create a misconception about the professional qualities of a person.
From the mass press, from various medical recommendations, we receive a lot of useful tips how to find peace in the difficult conditions of urban life. We are advised not to worry about trifling conflicts on the street, in transport; engage in auto-training, take deep breaths before reacting to an insult, etc. Of course, these recommendations are reasonable and healthy for the one who follows them. But it is hardly necessary to belittle the importance of cultivating an active civic interest in one's neighbor, which should also be manifested in the daily practice of communication.
For those who communicate, it is important not only not to notice the oversight of the person who serves you, but also not to forget to thank him for his diligence, cordiality and speed. The cultivation of the ability to be grateful, the ability to find delicate and appropriate forms of its expression lead to the multiplication of the value of communication, making it more complete.

Communication in the family

For many, the concept of etiquette fits into the rules of behavior at the table or when people first meet. The head of the etiquette school of the Kurchatov Center of Culture, Elena VERVITSKAYA, on the pages of the magazine "60 years is not age" claims that this concept is immeasurably broader, and the widest range of human relationships, especially in the family, depends on the observance of etiquette.

How to build harmonious relations of spouses with each other, with children, aging parents? What family traditions can be passed down from generation to generation? It must be assumed that most of us are notThe Simpsons, but psychological relationships are sometimes built not very simply. The author of the article reflects on this.

domestic furies
Many women can admit that they seem to have two looks in different situations. In public, they show tact, courtesy and tolerance in relationships with others. At home, they turn almost into furies who allow themselves to break down both on their husband and on their children.

One of my friends confessed: “When I come home from work, I immediately put things in order: I shout at my people, and they immediately scatter to their rooms.”
Would you call this behavior normal? A woman, called upon to be the keeper of the hearth, should in no case arrange such “releases that do not add peace and love” in the family. No matter how tired the mother is at work, she must understand that it is she who forms the atmosphere in the house. And here patience, self-control, and finally, good manners will come to the rescue.

What is meant by good manners in the family?
Firstly, in conversations with loved ones, no matter how they grieve you, you should never get excited. You need to restrain yourself, try to speak - briefly, calmly, naturally. Any categorical judgments can be softened with expressions like "I think", "I think". Before saying something or, even more so, doing something in relation to another, a tactful person will think - how will his words and actions be perceived, will they not offend anyone?

It is also undesirable to get involved in any disputes. Experience shows that if a dispute continues for a long time and is carried on stubbornly, then between the arguing there is a coldness of relations and even a feeling of hostility.

The vicious cold war
Well, what if the husband and wife are already involved in a conflict? Each family has its own “scenario of quarrels” between spouses. Some, at the slightest problem, switch to raised voices, criticize their "second half", prove their case with foam at the mouth, slam the door, beat the dishes. Others choose the tactics of the "cold war": they play silent, do not speak for weeks, and with all their appearance demonstrate alienation and indifference.

But we must understand: any quarrel must end in a truce, even in the most extreme cases. Never say terrible words to your spouse: “Go away!” Of course, the one who has nervous system more tender, and this, as a rule, is a woman. A culture of behavior requires us to be able to control ourselves, to be able to restrain ourselves, when, perhaps, we really want, following the example of some movie heroine, to throw a plate, throw a sharp insulting word, respond with rudeness to rudeness.

But someone first (the most prudent) should come up and say: "I'm sorry." And here, again, extremely much depends on the woman who forms the atmosphere in the family. She should be imbued with the idea that a quarrel is just a release, a surge of emotions that need to be extinguished. Think about the fact that during family quarrels you lose a particle of femininity and cuteness, and this is very dangerous for each of us.

Yes, you both got excited. Now sit down at the negotiating table and calmly state your positions. At the same time, try so that the children do not see how mom and dad sort things out. Never involve them in family quarrels, it will hurt them. It is very fraught to involve the mother-in-law or mother-in-law in clarifying the marital relationship. Just like talking badly about the parents of the husband to the wife (as well as to the husband about the parents of the spouse).

Culture helps love
Often it is ignorance of the culture of behavior in the family that leads to contradictions that kill love, respect for each other, make it impossible to live together. Compliance with the norms of etiquette should help build everyday life in family.

Everything here is made up of little things. Do not forget to say hello to all family members in the morning - and do not “mutter” something incomprehensible under your breath, but say affably, addressing with a smile: “Good morning, dear” or to the child - “Good morning, my sun”. But kissing, barely waking up, without brushing your teeth, without washing, is not worth it.

In many of our apartments there is only one toilet and one bathroom. To prevent everyone from pushing and rushing others in the morning, introduce order when someone gets up early.

Breakfast also has its own etiquette. No matter how you hurry, the table must be set - it is not necessary to lay a tablecloth, set the table and prepare starched napkins for everyone, but everyone should have their own plate and cup. Napkins can be paper - but they should definitely be. Bread, sausage, cheese should be carefully cut. Eat breakfast without haste, do not talk, especially on disturbing, unpleasant topics, such as discussing television news. Therefore, it is better to turn off the TV in the kitchen while eating.

When leaving, do not forget to say goodbye, you can kiss your relatives, and it is very good to warn them - when you return.

In the evening, if you are at home and meet your husband, do not be too lazy to say a few kind words to him in the hallway, smile. Show concern if you see that he is upset, but do not immediately demand explanations and a story.

If in the evening it turned out that there were some domestic or family problems, then do not solve them on the go - before dinner or during dinner, but after it. In general, try every moment to make everyone in the house calm and comfortable.

In many families, parents and grandparents get into "educational" excitement when they communicate with children. Often, adults raise their tone, get annoyed by criticizing the behavior of children, and in a mentoring tone set themselves as an example. Remember that children do not perceive words, but actions, and therefore parents are called upon to serve as a constant example of behavior in the family.

Of course, you need to draw the attention of children to their mistakes, but do it quietly, tactfully. I will give as an example my institute teacher, who created a very good atmosphere in the family. When she needs to discuss some serious problem with her son, she first takes out the most beautiful cups, brews fragrant tea, and only then negotiates in a comfortable atmosphere. Mom and son have a great relationship.

Dear old people
Many people live with elderly parents, and this also often creates additional stress in the family. Of course, living in the same apartment with an elderly person often requires patience and constant "diplomacy". Even if you live with your dear and beloved mother, you have to take into account the fact that she lives by strict rules that she learned decades ago and is not going to change them.

Eccentricities, tediousness, the claims of many old people are as natural and inevitable as the crying and whims of a baby or the emotionality and irritability of a teenager. Alas, every age has its own problems.

Why do many older people deteriorate in old age? Let's not talk about circulatory disorders of the brain, including those parts of it that are responsible for the psycho-emotional sphere - doctors can observe this. Psychologists note the fact that in most older people the brain gets less and less stress. After retirement, the field of activity narrows, they receive fewer new experiences.

Household chores, as a rule, have long been mastered, have become a daily routine. There remains a very limited circle of habitual affairs, memories and reflections, which sometimes turn out to be of little interest to busy and in a hurry young family members. They prefer to send grandparents to their couch so that they "do not get in the way." This is a very selfish position. We must not alienate ourselves from them, but, on the contrary, come up with physically easy things for the elderly, involve them in family life, showing them a sense of respect. This will help older people brighten up their inner loneliness. On the other hand, grouchy grandparents will not have time to observe the affairs of the young and bother them with their teachings.
Keepers of family traditions.

Here is a picture from life: grandparents are watching TV, and mom, dad and child are each sitting at their own computer. Communication with each other is minimized, there is a feeling of loneliness in one's own family.

But close people must be bound by family traditions. It is good when there are common interests, entertainment, joint rest in the house. In order to maintain family traditions, it is very important to constantly communicate with older family members, from whom the young take over generations, to ask them about the history of the family and society. You can be sure: if family albums are examined in your house from time to time, cherished caskets with letters and family heirlooms are opened in front of children, they constantly look after the graves of relatives, talk about how great-grandmothers and great-grandfathers lived, then there is a really good atmosphere and kind people in the family. traditions.

By the way, my family also has a wonderful tradition of keeping and rereading letters. Our dad is a real family chronicler. If you come to his house, you can see a superbly selected family archive. All photos are signed and placed in albums. All letters are kept in perfect order and are also folded into albums.

When we all get together at the dacha, dad often brings some of the old letters to the common table. For example, a letter written by my grandmother's father when he served as an orderly on the fronts of the First World War. It is dated 1916 and ends with the phrase: "Dear daughter, I kiss you a million times." We listen to these letters with bated breath. After all, this is a real connection between times and generations! Unfortunately, today the epistolary genre is largely lost. But in our family it is customary to write letters and postcards for the holidays, so there is always beautiful writing paper in the house.

If my husband cooks dinner on a Saturday night, he says to me: “Lena, you just set the table, and I will do the rest myself.” When dinner is ready, the husband rings the bell, and all the households gather at the table. In the country, we also have bells. When they ring, neighbors who know about our traditions say: “They drink tea at the Vervitskys” ...
I am sure that such simple and kind emotions make up a happy family life.

"The family is the primary womb of human culture"

I.Ilyin

Speech on the topic "The culture of behavior is laid in the family"

Kuzmich Alla Fedorovna,

social teacher

Culture is valuable for all mankind, it is dear to all. It is not dear only to those people who are deprived of it. Culture, and only culture can help us.

Education of a culture of behavior is today one of the components of moral education

Raising a culture of behavior means teaching a child everywhere and in everything to respect society as a whole and each of its members individually. The rule is very simple, but alas, in everyday practice, human relations are far from being carried out by everyone and are not always carried out. Meanwhile, the culture of human relations, communication between people play an important role in life. If a child manages to communicate culturally with relatives, acquaintances, he will behave in the same way with complete strangers.

The culture of work and behavior are qualities that are an indicator of a person's attitude to his work, people, society and testify to his social maturity. Their foundations are laid by parents in childhood, and then continue to develop and improve.

Often the culture of behavior is considered as a trinity: the culture of appearance, the culture of communication and the culture of everyday life.

The culture of appearance is one of the components of the culture of behavior. The appearance of a person plays an important role in the practice of communication. Psychologists note the tendency of people to evaluate the merits and demerits of someone on the basis of only one appearance, since it is perceived as an integral characteristic of the personality.

On how the appearance of a person (child) is assessed by others and himself, his mood and well-being largely depend. Often a person seems attractive not because of physical beauty, but because of the charm, which lies in a pleasant, kind, cheerful facial expression. However, some children make faces when communicating, wrinkle their forehead and nose. They raise their eyebrows high, smile wryly, capriciously stretch their lips. Such behavior should be prevented and prohibited so that children have open faces, lively friendly eyes, the beauty of which is emphasized by facial expressions and gestures developed by good education. It is known that the eyes are the mirror of the human soul.

The appearance of a person is manifested in expressive movements, which should be moderate, smooth.

Walking and posture can tell a lot about the culture of appearance. When walking with a child, visiting a store, parents should show and remind him how to hold his body, head, how to wave his arms and raise his legs. You can tell your son (daughter): "Let's imagine that we are on the podium." At the same time, parents themselves demonstrate a straight posture, moderate arm span, accurate leg movements and demand the same from the child. The child must understand that gait and posture paint a person and they can be adjusted if desired.

The ability to dress beautifully is also an element of the culture of appearance. Parents also help in the formation of it. The guys should clearly understand that only those clothes are good that correspond to the situation: at school - a school uniform; at home - home clothes; for a walk - maybe sportswear, for a celebration - festive clothes, etc. Modern clothes are comfortable and varied: weekend and casual, sports and special. The boundaries between these categories are increasingly blurred, but children must know that they must come to school in appropriate clothing. Adults should take part in the discussion of outfits, focus on what is beautiful, harmonious. This will contribute to the improvement of children's ideas about the beauty of appearance.

Sometimes school-age children strive to decorate their appearance: they begin to wear cheap rings, chains, earrings. Children should be told what is beautiful and ugly, appropriate and inappropriate, about taste and bad taste. It is important to form in them a sense of proportion in everything. For this, it is necessary to give examples from literature, fairy tales. Sometimes (it can be taken as mandatory), when going to visit, it is advisable to arrange a demonstration of models. Let the children put on all their outfits, walk around the room, look in the mirror. At the same time, the mother will comment on each of the outfits and determine which one is more appropriate in this case. Then you can switch roles: the mother demonstrates her outfits, and the daughter comments and helps her make her choice (including hairstyles and jewelry)

The boundaries of decent and indecent should be known to children from childhood (for example, should be reduced to a minimum in in public places manifestation of such physiological processes as coughing, sneezing, etc.)

It is necessary to form a culture of appearance with elementary accuracy and cleanliness, compliance with sanitary and hygienic standards. It is advisable at a younger age to use playful forms of introducing kids to them, for example, “Visiting Moidodyr” Let the child brush his teeth, wash his hands, wash his face, use a comb, towel with his friend Moidodyr. However, it should be remembered that if the tradition of brushing your teeth and taking a shower in the evening has not been established by mom and dad, then it is very difficult to teach a child.

Work on the education of a culture of appearance, as a rule, is carried out in two directions: developing a correct understanding of the external and internal beauty of a person and teaching children the art of being attractive, equipping them with knowledge of specific ways of “creating oneself” It is necessary to work in such a way that the student realizes that« everything should be beautiful in a person: the face, and clothes, and the soul and thoughts .... (A. Chekhov)

In a family, the style of relationships is of great importance. Politeness in address multiplies the energy of each of its members, makes everyone “stronger”. It is important not to raise your voice, not to give orders. This shows the triumph of parental authority. Compliance with the norms of politeness protects against many conflicts. Creates a friendly atmosphere, improves mood. It is advisable to start every day in the family by greeting each other. It is good if the good morning wish is accompanied by physical contact. Many psychologists believe that with physical contact, energy is exchanged, which makes the child stronger.

An indispensable condition for educating children in a culture of communication is the formation of a position of openness, friendliness, trust, and a sense of joy from communication. A necessary condition for the formation of a culture of communication, the normal development of a child is the need for love. This need is satisfied when the child is informed that we love him, we need him, we value him, and finally, that he is just good. Such messages are contained in friendly glances, affectionate touches, a friendly smile, which is an essential feature of the appearance, and, of course, in direct words: “It’s good that you were born with us”, “I’m glad to see you”, “I love when are you home""…

The main means of communication is language, speech, word.

The culture of speech is another component of the culture of behavior. According to how a person owns this means of communication, they judge the level of his upbringing.

It is no secret that young people today communicate in their own jargon (slang), and even worse, use foul language. The task of each of the parents is to fight jargon (cool, hippie, slaughter, great, frown, don’t arise - you’ll get screwed) and, of course, with obscene words.

Child's notebook, writing in mobile phones as well as communication in social network are directly related to culture, language, creativity.

The personal charm of a person is also manifested in the ability to speak, talk. The culture of communication includes the ability to correctly navigate the situation and select phrases, taking into account who, why, what and how to say. Entering into communication, each person selects words that help to establish and maintain "feedback" with the interlocutor. This also applies to communication with children.

The art of communicating with people, in addition to the ability to speak, conduct a conversation, includes the ability to listen carefully to the interlocutor. Interrupting a person, preventing him from speaking to the end was considered and is considered the height of tactlessness. It should also be remembered outside conversation. You know well that a well-mannered person will never allow himself to talk to others when they are standing while sitting.

Oral speech is inseparable from gestures, however, it is necessary to ensure that gestures are not energetic. To demonstrate with an example what this can lead to.

Equally important is the tone of the conversation. The same word sounds differently if you say it with different intonation. Children should be encouraged to listen to themselves more often. To do this, it is useful to read poetry, prose together, to enrich the child’s vocabulary with phrases of speech etiquette, such as: I’m sorry, I’m not smart, I’m guilty ... The point, of course, is not the number of “magic words” said, but the fact that they never forget about a kind word for another person.

The art of arguing without violating good relations also needs to be taught from childhood. The most elementary thing that the guys need to learn: a fist, swearing, listing the interlocutor's shortcomings are not arguments in a dispute.

The attitude of the child to the surrounding objects, norms of behavior, life in the home arises indirectly, thanks to his communication with all family members. The emotions that accompany this communication help the child understand the meaning given to the world around them by loved ones. He reacts sharply to the tone and intonation of adults, sensitively captures the general style, the atmosphere of relations. The family provides the child with a variety of behavioral models that he will be guided by, acquiring his own social experience. Based on specific actions, ways of communication that the child sees in the immediate environment and in which he himself is drawn by adults, he learns to compare, evaluate, choose certain forms of behavior, methods of interaction with the surrounding reality.

An integral part of everyday culture is the ability to rationally and tastefully organize the external environment and your home. To prevent the virus of money-grubbing and consumerism from infecting young people, one should educate them, talk about a sense of proportion, necessity and sufficiency.

The culture of everyday life includes the ability to rationally use time. It is necessary to educate the child in the habit of constantly recording time (how much time he walked today, how much he watched TV, how much he spent on preparing lessons) and planning it. The child should imagine how he will spend his free time. However, he needs help in this, that is, suggest ways. In this way, a notebook can be used, where the child fixes things for tomorrow. In the evening, by crossing out, he summarizes what has been done.

When organizing work to realize the saving of time, it is necessary that children learn the most important thing: the attitude to their own and other people's time as a greater value, because this is one of the indicators of a culture of behavior, a sign of an educated person.

Adults also play a large role in cultivating a culture of behavior in public places and in transport. As an example, parents should first of all monitor their own behavior.

This is an obligatory rule of the culture of behavior, which is brought up not with the help of moralizing, but in the whole way, way of life, relationships that exist in the family. The rudeness of children towards their parents in most cases occurs because tactlessness and rudeness reigned in relations between themselves.

A family, family values, traditions are important elements of culture, are necessary and significant for a person for centuries. In the process historical development society values ​​of the family through tradition are passed on to new generations as a model of behavior in the family and society.

It is impossible to imagine a family without certain established traditions, since almost all families celebrate holidays, celebrate the birthdays of family members, the beginning and end of school year with schoolchildren, obtaining a passport, coming of age, etc. Common events should be celebrated by children and adults in a special way, with fiction, games, riddles, tasks, and not reduced to drinking alcoholic beverages.

Birthdays of children and adults should be organized festively in the family. At the same time, the main thing is that at such a holiday they do not forget about the birthday boy, so that there is no boredom and monotony, so that parents do not feel superfluous at the celebration of children. And vice versa, so that children are always welcome at the celebration of their parents.

It is a great tradition to present gifts on the days of family celebrations. Children need to be taught this. When choosing a gift, as a rule, it is necessary to focus on its value for the birthday person. So it doesn't have to be expensive. The best gift would be a handmade item.

Family traditions can be the simplest, most unpretentious, but they are remembered by the child, awaken the best feelings in him.

The moral and educational potential of family traditions is enormous. He brings up the ability to love, respect, understand each other, feel another person next to him. Family traditions leave their mark on the culture of human needs, desires, contribute to the development of the ability to manage one's desires, regulate them, give up some of them for the benefit of the family. Traditions also influence the formation of personality traits. The upbringing of a sense of duty, the ability to take responsibility for one's actions, caring for each other is much more successful in families with established positive traditions. However, it should be remembered that these traditions do not arise by themselves. To create them, you need a lot of hard work, a high spiritual culture of your parents.

There are times when guys know the rules of conduct, but do not follow them. There are several reasons for this.

1. Children just don't know some rules. However, ignorance of the rules is a simple and easily eliminated reason.

2. The guys know some rules of behavior, but they don’t know how to follow them correctly. This means that they have not developed a habit that is formed by repeated exercise.

3. Sometimes a child knows the rules of behavior, knows how to follow them, but ... does not follow. Most likely this is due to his lack of willpower in achieving something.

4. Often the guys do not follow the rules, considering them unnecessary, unimportant, that they were simply invented by adults.

It must be remembered that in order to form a certain habit of behavior, exercises are needed. To do this, each of the parents can use natural life situations, create conditions that encourage the child to act morally, allowing him to practice the rules of a culture of behavior.

1. Do not teach culture instructively. Excessive moralization causes a desire to act out of spite.

2. Involve the child in feasible activities.

3. Create special situations - tasks.

4. More often use methods of self-determination in relation to children "Assignment to yourself", "Diary of good deeds", "Step forward".

5. In the education of a culture of behavior, widely use games and game situations

7.Create various memos with the children.

8. Remember that in the education of a culture of behavior there are situations when no words are needed at all, an example, a sample of an act, is enough.

9. Teach the child to repeat the necessary actions and deeds so that his behavior becomes relaxed and natural.

10. Remember: you are the main educator, you are an example.

Questionnaire

What role does appearance human?

Do your parents teach you to dress with taste. What does tasteful mean?

Do you agree that culture is laid down in the family?

What traditions do you have in your family?

Do you follow the rules of behavior in various life situations?

Psychology of communication in the family

Communication. Great power is hidden in communication, in the ability to communicate with each other. Communication in the family is of great importance for spouses. If there is no communication, there is no family happiness. Develop a culture of communication in your family, talk about everything, talk about all the topics and difficulties that concern you, discuss what is happening now and what you are striving for in two, three, four years. And ten years later?

As long as there is communication between you, you will have family happiness. As soon as you stop talking, you will become uninteresting to each other. As soon as you start spending your evenings in front of the TV or with a magazine, instead of spreading a blanket on the floor, lighting candles, pouring tea and having family “talker” evenings, coldness will immediately appear in the relationship. Do you want it?

Here I can immediately say that there is no need to take everything with hostility and say: “And when do we communicate: work, children, washing, ironing, cooking, but there is already not enough strength for communication.” You perfectly understand that everything depends on the person and on his desire. Cause should not be confused with effect. Often it is mutual reproaches and insults, lack of time due to the fact that one person in the family does much more than the other, arises precisely because of the lack of constant communication and heart-to-heart talk.

How to talk to a man, how to ask him and convince him to help you around the house, the topic of a separate article and not one. And such articles are already on our site. Now I will only say that if you learn to communicate, learn to understand each other, calmly and confidently convey your wishes to your partner, then the question that “there is not enough time and the husband does not help around the house” will leave your life. Plus, if you have children, spending family evenings together - communication, you will lay in their subconscious an image of family happiness. And mutual understanding in the family, which they will observe from childhood, will help them build their family happiness in the future.

How great it is to be bored and look forward to every evening. With a desire to meet, hug and ask each other about how your day went? What was interesting and funny? What were the difficulties? What turned out well, what feats did your a real man? - And just listen, just laugh or say: “You will succeed, you will cope with everything, I believe in you!”

And imagine how amazing you can learn about your partner, with whom you have lived for many years, if you learn to listen and communicate.

The main thing is to find time at least a couple of times a week, sit down together and ask: “What do you like? What are you into now? What would you like (want) in three years in your life? What are you living now? Are you satisfied with everything, or do you want to change something in yourself or in our life?

After all, sometimes it only seems to us that we know everything about the person living next to us.. Although in fact we do not even know half of what is happening in his life, what he feels, what he strives for, what he fears, what he likes and what annoys him. We only "seem". In fact, try to stop and ask around your beloved (beloved), and then silently, very carefully listen. Do not interrupt or finish the phrase for your partner, as many people like to do, but let the person speak at least once in your entire life together.

How to do it? Imagine that you asked a question and filled your mouth with water. And no matter how much you now want to add something, argue with something, “fix” something and say it your way, you cannot do this. Try it. I assure you, you will learn a lot of new and interesting things for yourself. And after a while, you will catch yourself starting to be surprised and somehow look at your soulmate in a new way. After all, your partner, like any other person, is a huge, unexplored Universe, and I am sure that he (she) is a very interesting person!

If it doesn’t work the first time and your significant other is surprised by such “suddenly” interest, don’t be surprised and don’t push your position. After all, perhaps for many years you talked only on everyday topics, sometimes quarreled and demanded something.

Therefore, be patient and wise, and if the person is not yet ready to open up, tell a little about yourself, but only a little. Tell us how you want your relationship to develop. Tell us why the person you live with is dear to you. Thank your partner for everything he/she does for you. Indeed, in life we ​​so rarely hear words of gratitude and simply the words “Thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for being you and for what you do for our family." And if you yourself do not hear such words from your partner, but at the same time you want to hear them, can you first learn to give and give to another person what we want to see in our lives?

Give each other time, gain wisdom and patience, and build your relationship as if you had just met and strive to learn everything about each other: what kind of music do you like to listen to, what movies do you like to watch, what do you like to do in your free time, what do you dream about, what kind of person he wants to become in a few years, what kind of relationship he wants to develop in the family, etc., etc.

You can tell and offer your partner this idea as an exciting game. As an idea, as if you meet a stranger twice a week who you like a lot and get to know him from scratch. It is so interesting to you that you listen to it with bated breath and absorb new information with every cell. And a new person opens before you, with those fears, experiences, dreams and joys that you did not even suspect.

By the way, it really is. Many people continue to live with the ideas about their loved ones that they had five, ten, fifteen years ago. But after all, a lot has changed during this time, and even more so, your partner has changed too. What did he/she have to live with? What to go through, what successes, achievements and disappointments happened in his life? How does he/she feel about you? And what would you like him/her to experience? Maybe it's still worth trying to revive what was before? Try it, you will surely succeed.

What I also want to say in conclusion is that learning to communicate and listen to each other is possible not only with a husband or wife. Here I am not talking about those people, as they are called "energy vampires", who can talk incessantly and on various topics. No, I'm talking now about ourselves and about those people dear to us, ideas about which we formed 10, 15, or 20 years ago and live in the past in these ideas, I'm not trying to get to know a person anew. This often happens with parents when they do not want to notice their children growing up and believe that their son or daughter still loves sausage sandwiches and eats a whole cake in one sitting, like in adolescence.

Try to silently listen to your children, your relatives and people close to you in spirit, your friends and colleagues. Sometimes, when you really want to interrupt another person and say: “Yes, yes, but you know, I also have ...”, or “But you remember, a few years ago you ...”, remember this article and just listen to the person. Ask him questions about himself. About his interests and hobbies, and I think you will be very surprised how many misconceptions and outdated information you have accumulated. Perhaps you will begin to discover the world around you and the people living in it as if from anew.

Rule 1 Don't try to change your spouse. It is important to be the right person for yourself. Treat his friends and family with respect, even if you don't like them.

Rule 2. Give in to each other. Consider the interests and needs of your spouse, avoid misunderstandings and quarrels. Use common sense in your requests.

Rule 3 Don't force your point of view on your spouse. Let each give his view of the problem and consider the objections of the other. If the argument is deadlocked, move the conversation to another topic. And we can talk about this later.

Rule 4 Consider each other's feelings. Try to control your behavior. Don't take it out on your loved ones. Try to relax, talk about the problem. Even if an upset spouse tries to unleash a conflict, do not give in, do not respond with rudeness to rudeness. Show interest in his problems.

Rule 5 Do not follow the advice of friends, relatives, who assure that he or she must be punished, taught a lesson. Believe me, you will suffer no less.

Rule 6 Do not be offended by each other for a long time, do not be vindictive, do not try to take revenge. Hold back negative emotions. Don't grumble.

Rule 7 Respect each other. Try to be worthy of respect. Make an effort to keep your relationship happy and warm. Arrange small holidays for yourself, take care of each other, show signs of attention.

Rule 8 Self-criticism is a useful procedure in your actions and deeds. Before making any demand, say to yourself: "What do I want to get?" "How to do it?" Then many conflicts can be avoided. Make high demands on yourself. Be able to admit your mistakes.

Rule 9 Do not insult each other, strive to see only good in your companion. Every person has positive qualities. Relatives and friends should talk about them, and not about the shortcomings noticed.

Be proud of your loved ones, it helps to believe in yourself.
Support each other!